The Heart is an Arrow, It Demands Aim to Land True

 The problem seems clear now, evidently. I need love to enrich me and lift me up. That's what it took last time I went down this rabbit hole. This time it seems easier but still quite a daunting task. The Cerberus is staring me down and I refuse to look away. The three-pronged guardian of peace stands in my way of becoming the harbinger of doom upon the savage land of the Judas in my mind. Gratitude, that is what I feel towards this beast. Doomed to guard the dark for eternity yet rears its ugly heads as a symbol of chaos to come. It isn't much but it provided me with enough to know where to begin and what to strive towards. I have been feeling recently as if I'm lacking purpose, reason. Maybe I have no purpose or maybe my purpose is to forever be in chase of what I WANT my purpose to be. And I refuse to believe that I was put here for no reason, just to twiddle my thumbs and pick my nose, metaphorically ofcourse. 

Love liberated me, enchanted me, engulfed me and I succumbed to it just as easily as a recovering alcoholic falls off the wagon: with ease and grace as if this is what I was meant for. And the lovely woman who shared this souffle of passion contacted me today. I reached out to her a few days ago as research for my visit to the land of villainous vagabonds. And she was of no help because perhaps we haven't been a part of each other's life for quite a while that there's a sense of unfamiliarity among us. Perhaps I could consider changing that after today. She simply texted me to check up on me, said she felt uneasy this morning so she decided to reach out. I didn't disclose anything to her yet. Maybe I should've because she's probably the one who's known me the most intimately in my life at one point. But that familiarity is hiding deep within or perhaps doesn't exist and now I'm curious to find out. She didn't do much except ask me what's up. But her approaching me, interlinked with my introspection session from a while ago got me to this conclusion that I simply lack love and that could be my salvation once more. Maybe I'm wrong but maybe I'm right and that is worth exploring.