No, I Haven't Given Up on the Blog Yet

 You know what's funny? I never expected this blog to gain so much popularity. Now, I know it isn't famous and stuff but still, I just thought it'll be lost in a dark corner of internet years ago. But now, we have over a thousand views. And I can't get over the fact that over a thousand people are actually curious to read the bullshit I spew. My most viewed posts include An Ode to Odile, What Could've Been. Now, I have a decent feeling who keeps rereading the Odile post. So, thank you, Odile. Sometimes, I wish you had a better eye for friends and people you keep close to yourself. The crowd you run with is what leads you down the path of pain every time. As of now, only Nancy is someone who's actually good for you. Everyone else you hang out with are just viruses. They'll corrupt your heart until there's nothing left to corrupt. But nuff about someone who would replace me with any other person who has a bike. The What Could've Been post is something very close to my heart. I don't think I have any feelings towards her anymore, but it will be one of my life's biggest what if moments. And, thus it must not be something I indulge in often, because I don't deal in what ifs. But every now and then, I let myself break my rules for a while. Controlled chaos is the best kind of chaos and it keeps malicious intent at bay. I'm grateful for her to have been in my life and I am grateful for the support, whatever support has come my way throughout the years from various individuals. I am not a group kinda person. Most of my life, I've been alone and by myself. But every once in a while, there's that one person that just makes life that much more beautiful and gives it a whole new meaning. Some of them stole my heart, some stole my possessions but all of them gave me love and support, no matter how short term. And I'll always be grateful for them. But now for the ones who truly are grateful to have ME. It is still shocking to me that there's people who are actually glad they can call me their friend. I mean, I haven't heard them say this to me, but I'd like to think they aren't so fake that they'd do so much for me, care for me, look out for me, and help me just out of the goodwill of their hearts. And they've all been mentioned here before anyways. You know them as Blossoms, Hugsy, Hyuna and Goldie. I have known them for about 2 years now, and somehow it feels like yesterday that I was just warming up to them. To them it probably didn't seem like it but in my mind, I was like a timid little puppy, slowly testing the waters and seeing what I can get away with. This was especially strong with Hugsy, because annoying him was just so much fun. I've told him this and I pay my dues for it even now. All I have to say to you, Hugsy, after all the mockery that you've thrown at me over the years, is this. IT WAS WORTH ITTTTTTTTT! I love you though man, dearly. And all of you guys too. You've been a really big support in my life whether you guys realise it or not. All I hope for is something of a similar significance I hope I had in your lives too. I know I did in Hugsy's life, he's very utilitarian. But that just makes him very easy to connect with and just vibe with. The others, a bit difficult to read but I'm still glad I got you guys. Blossoms, you and I have known each other the shortest amount of time in this little elegy, but you... you're alright my man. You don't reply to my messages, or watch the reels I send you, but you're alright. You have my respect and my support should you ever need it. 

I guess the whole point of this post was gratitude. I don't know for SURE that this gratitude is reciprocated, I think it is but can't be sure. Either way, I don't care, I'm just enjoying the company and loving the people who I've spent these years of my life with. When I get back I'm getting you all some gifts, I'll edit this post and add them here once I've figured out what I'm getting. SO if you're intuitive enough, you'll feel an urge to randomly check out my blog, if not, SURPISE BITCHES. Anyways, gratitude is a beautiful feeling and there's always a reason for it, You just gotta know how to look for it. Peace out, bros. See you in a few weeks.